I was Icarus and you were the sun
And boy did you burn.
You engulfed me in your flame
then nothing was -
For we were never
equal
Embrace
Swimming in the warmth of your embrace
I drown
For you are the sea that carries me
To further heights
A Girl Can Cry
Crying is a sign of weakness to my mother.
"
Don't waste your tears
"
"
Don't let them see you cry
"
"
Don't ever let them know they've won
"
But I...
I just want to cry.
See
- I cry these tears to ease my pain
Like drops of dew anew, this rain that hits…
And burns,
You lied again!
I lay -
Here.
Here, lies my motion less body
"
Don't cry
"
she said
You'll find a new way
But today
I release - this tension.
What's New
My black dad gone wrong story
Black dad; be strong for me
Broken record isn’t it?
Yet
the pain in my chest
the anger in my veins
nestled with thoughts in my head
seduced by the Death…of a love that was
Never.
Truly.
Mine.
I Died Today
Increasingly invisible I lay, sheltered by the insecurities that possess my mind
Increasingly invisible I lay, watching the world pass me by
Please
Take these broken wings of mine, save me from myself
- What have I become?
Bruises fade, pain remains
and before you know it - only scattered truths prevail
Pictures of a better time intoxicate my mind
I lost myself when you stole this heavy heart.
Increasingly invisible I lay, I’ve learnt to hide before wondering eyes
Increasingly invisible I lay, my will is weak and sadness has a way of always knowing my name
Look into my eyes,
see the rhythm of my heart-beat, as I let it go
All the fear and pain I hold
-within me
So, bruises fade and pain remains
Before you know it, you can’t even remember your own name.
Pictures of a better time intoxicate my mind
-Like a broken record
Inhale Exhale
Your breathing soothes me.
Inhale the rhythm of your beating heart
Exhale my insecurities.
In out - in out - in out - of
My mind; your essence consumes me.
Ba dum ba dum my heart beats.
My heart speaks the language of a thousand lost souls crying out for attention in the sea of our own desperations.
Ba dum ba dum - Its yours
Yet… You do not weep…
You do not see the signs of my fragile body wandering these streets on my own
without life, without my heart - your home.
Inhale exhale
I taste your breath as my own yet you remain one body with two hearts two souls…
I’m empty
Brickhouse
Remember these walls I built?!
I built them for her
I built them for him
I built them for you
It’s hard to not want to give up in a world where you feel like disaster knows your name "heyyy baby" replays while the explosion inside of your veins burns through and true and you have lost your faith - a world you once knew A world you should belong to is no longer safe
all it is…is nothing but-
Promises of broken smiles and hearts of an innocent child as she sits. Waiting…waiting, waiting for the magic to be seen. Waiting to be heard. Waiting for the world to change!
But a zebra can’t change it’s stripes…
and this jungle, my jungle
is somewhat not the same.
So these walls “i” built?
Yeh these strong solid structures of protection?
They represent a lifetime of neglect- shunned away by the ones who are suppose to love you most- shunned away by the promise of dreams and hopes
Yeh these walls i built…
I built them for me
I built them for you
And I’m a brick-
House
Baby
Four SLASH Five
I want to break things
And throw things,
and scream and rip and crush and bleed
I want to bleed
But most of all in this moment, I want to feel so numb
that reality isn’t an option
I want to go to the river and hold my breath until I have no more left to give
And float
whilst being encompassed by all the world collapsing around me.
In my head
So I write
Because my mind is too slow to show me my path
and my brain is too fast when it goes (fuck it goes!)
and then my mouth can’t find the words to say…
I write because idle hands are the devil’s workshop
and if so, then mine are certainly tools slaving away…
“Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds”
Mind.
Mind…
Mine!
Mine?
yet i am a mental slave of this state I call existence
A cell block with assistance from these idle hands of mine
that need to write and draw somehow to occupy their time
and break their will to lift my soul like a cellmate counting down the days to ease his mind,
through the sticks and dashes he knows as time -
One, Two, Three, Four slash Five
as I start another line in this sentence
-my sentence.